I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize