have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Michael Bay diarrhea
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize