So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
