how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize