if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
