haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
