I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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