matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
