So drunk, too bad you don't want this
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Two words: blizzard sex
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
