Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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