But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
