she smelled like a LAN party
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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