So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
