A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
NoShamevember. You game?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
