is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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