Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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