We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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