and she was petting her beer can
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
