He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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