She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
