Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
