i don't like sucking hair
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
