if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
He uses pillows to masturbate.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
