why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Can you bring me the toilet please
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
