ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
