so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Come on in and take your pants off
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
