Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
