I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
