i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
