ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
