I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
