You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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