Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
