talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
