i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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