At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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