that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
