It's like God shit irony all over that family
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
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