When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
