is your mom at the bar?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Randomize
