So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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