so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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