i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
