Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
