ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Enjoy the penises
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
