4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
worst night to have a conscience
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Randomize
