I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Sorry about my life...
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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