i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
The power of my boobs compel you
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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