Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
