I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
